Waterboy

Yup,

Today I played the role of waterboy. I carried four bottles and stood along side of the road for my teammate. Unfortunately I carried four full bottles back to the house. It was a tough race today but I think I enjoyed watching from the sidelines. Though I would have preferred turning myself inside out to try and stay on a wheel. I would prefer killing myself on the bike to watching a race any day of week. My teammate did not make it all the way through the race but mentally I didn't either and I wasn't even racing. If I raced it would have been 133km with a bunch of pro's and ex pros. A level I don't even dream about obtaining because I might consider it more of a nightmare (not really but that is a deep topic). To be at that level is just, well, its pro eh?



I think tomorrow I will be seeing a dochter about my stomach problems. It is not that I enjoy chatting about my stool but really, I need to fix it. I think I'm passing everything I eat and it has really contributed to a pale looking, tired feeling, no power producing cyclist. Crazy too because a few days before I felt sick I was feeling really strong. Good thing I got sick, I love seeing my potential go out the window. At least those are the kinds of thoughts I have at night. In the morning. In the evening. Anytime I think really. I just sit and slouch, allowing my shoulders to hang closer to the ground. With them my head, moral, and ego. I think I have written about this before but in a different licht. A whole week lost and weeks of fitness gone. I don't know if all cyclists are really this difficult on themselves but I will admit that when my performance on the bike suffers I can easily slip into a mini-phase of depression. Filled with petit guilt trips of eating sweets and wanting to drink an extra beer or two just to sleep a bit easier. It is not a pretty cycle or should I write "cyclist?" I might compare it to a getting dumped by a girl. Naw, I take that back. No similarities. I think, in fact I know, somewhere inside of me is a very addictive personality. I have powerful cravings for certain pieces of the pie that life can be divided into. While enjoying a slice of life along comes the positive sensations from your taste buds and the negative feedback from the brain. Why are you eating this? You don't need it! Just once slice, yea but I want another! I don't really know what all this means and I feel like I'm starting to sound like I need help. Perhaps this is one of the factors that determines success? The ability to maintain control over one's own direction.


Each and every one of us desires some sort of outcome from life. We have goals, expectations, dreams. We make sacrifices, commitments, promises to ourselves and wouldn't anyone know it the moment we get what have hunted most of us so easily give into a distracting non-cumulative aspect of our brain. The brain just goes "hey! You quite smoking how about a cigarette to celebrate?" or "hey! great job getting fit and loosing weight, now I want a lot of chocolate." Dammit! What is the key to maintaining focus? Heck, I've even had to muster up some self-incentive programs just to blog this week. I've been sick and so quickly I say to myself "ah self, you are sick, just relax." Reminds me of a Dutch expression "rest en rust." I'm starting to notice a correlation between my desire to write about my life and my overall mood. The more positive I am the more eager I am to share my thoughts and stores. I'm sure this is only natural. Of course having some Sicilian decent probably exaggerate matters. We're not know for being in touch with emtions. Nothing like the feeling of not being productive to ignite the thought of falling behind. Frustrating to say the least. I feel as I have a natural ability to not see things through. Whenever I begin to witness myself progressing in the direction I want my brain diverts itself. The brain learns to realize when it not getting to taste other pieces of the pie and it selfishly tries to deviate from underlying path you've previously chosen. Pic: waiting along side of the road with bidons.

How is that for a bike rack? Something you'll never see in the US.












On a brighter note I went to my first ever futball match yesterday night. Anderlecht verse Cercle in Brussels. The Juplier League as it is called. I don't know much about the game as it stands in Europe or even Belgium for that matter. I played as a kid for quite sometime. As a keeper. I really enjoyed the sport. Something about being on teams though that got to me. I was started to want something I could do I my own. Become a determinate of my own success. Cycling was the new sport, little did I know it was team sport at the top level!


Two pictures; one in the evening just as the game was getting underway and the other once the lights were in full effect. I also added a video more for the sounds of the crowd than anything else. Something about being at a game and having the entire stadium just singing in harmony, chanting away. It sounds pretty awesome.









I have no idea what this is for. I found it strange the photo even came out. I was sitting in bus stop terminal changing a flat.











Speaking of flat tires, this is my flat repair kit. I took a picture because other than taking it with me I usually never have to use it. I like it that way. Last Thursday and Friday (I think it was two days) I got three flats. Time for some new tires.








The strongest beer in Belgium, or so the label says. I didn't drink any but before I fly home you can be sure I'll have at least one. Check out the label, 12 degrees. Is it still beer at that point?